21 1 / 2014
I”m grateful for having Leo at this point in my life. He’s crucial to my growth and career advancement. He’s helping me so much.
I’m grateful for Chuck for taking a chance on me and giving me substantial work. I just really hope to do a great job for him.
I’m grateful for my mom being so supportive and understanding of my dreams and goals.
11 1 / 2014
Haters are my motivators
I just realized that I do have haters, that not everyone is nice and that I have to fight for everything that I want.
But that’s so effing motivating. It’s a great feeling to have to earn something rather than to have it given to you. I just feel so incredibly lucky to be in my position. To be back n DC to be given a chance. It just feels so surreal and I want to do a great job. I want to be the best at work and I want to go to grad school. I just want to be the best person I can be and I think my haters help fuel it. Their insecurities at first made me feel so insecure and I don’t know, we all have them. I don’t feel smart most of the time or attractive. but that’s something I disguise. And when you hear it from someone else in another conversation, it’s just a little hurtful, yes. It definitely not what you want to hear but it fuel me to be successful in pursing my dreams and goals. I just want to be happy. I have to do that on my own, and no man can do that. I have to do it myself.
Of course, I have so much help and I am extremely grateful. I would not have been able to do it without them or even him. He’s such a great addition to my life but I don’t know how long it will last. When he’ll decide to hurt me or when I will hurt him, which i doubt. I’m just scared because I am so damn loyal and I have a hard time trusting. I obviously have reason to be distrustful but not to act yet….I am observing. I know it will hurt, oh man, it will. But he’s helping me at such a critical point that he’s already an important person in my life. Just thinking about it makes me cry.
But it’s happened before and I know I am strong and that I will pursue my goals and help people. I will also travel the world. And that’s why I am so damn happy! Because only I can hold myself back….and not him. he doesn’t have control.
03 7 / 2013
11 1 / 2013
So I have finally felt inspired to write and I’m super happy, strangely. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened lately but I do feel extra loved. I woke up to a cupcake from my roommate from DC cupcakes and a voicemail from my drunk friends last night. I really miss them. Also I had a really good week at work because my friends are working at the hill now so I can have lunch with them. It was Cristela and Charlie’s bday this week as well as Leti’s first day at work at my office. I have been reading 2 good books lately and have been making a very conscious effort to eat more healthy. With that said, I have been adjusting well to DC life. There have been several up and downs along the way. Sometimes I hate my 40 minute commute to work which consists of a 12 min walk to the metro, 16 min metro ride and 10 min. walk from the metro through security to the elevator and finally to my desk on the 4th floor of one of the buildings from the U.S House of Representatives. I hate having to carry grocceries home and not having my own car sometimes. I sometimes do feel alone but many other times I feel so fortuante to be given this amazing opportunity. I am beyond happy and grateful even though I have become a bit more cynical…
With that being said, I have been insipired to write my goals for this year. They have been swirling in my mind for a few weeks and months now but I have to write them or rather type them down to solidify their existensce and so I won’t forget.
Goals of 2013
- Travel the East Coast. Since I have been here, I haven’t done much exploring. I need to expand….need to plan some trips and this is where I would like to go…
Niagra Falls/Candian border
And all the other states DE, RI, VT, etc.
Can’t forget North Carolina and FLORIDA!
Get a job for the summer in DC and register for classes at NOVA and take the GRE. Basically prep for the GRE here….(less distractions and more space than home).
Move to Latin America….I would like to teach English in Mexico for 6 months and then in Brazil for 6 months. I would like to move to Mexico DF or Guadalajara and then I don’t know what city in Brazil.
I need to reach out to everyone that I know that has those connections including
Veronica - mentor
For Brazil, I would need to contact
Hopefully I’ll be able to make some contacts and work from there. Ever since I graduated college, I felt a need to work abroad and I can’t get it out of my mind. I feel like I have an espinita that I need to take out. I need to go out and get it out of my system.
I want to go to Latin America, first to improve my Spanish and learn Portuguese. Second, I want to go back to the roots and understand living in Latin America…I am enjoying my time in DC but I want to go back to humble and friendliness. I love that everyone here is so passionate, ambitious and driven. I feel like I can thrive here…..but I need to go somewhere where people are not so obsessed with work and take relaxation seriously. Or that are humble and not so pompous about their work position. DC is a bubble and a lot of people here want to create change in order to improve the lives of others but you can get so worked up into this bubble of work, happy hours and going out that you may sometimes lose that connection with the people that you are trying to help. That’s why I love grassroots organizations because it’s so direct. Although I feel sometimes I am more useful at a federal and national level.
I love Latin American culture, I love to be Latina in the U.S. but I want to live it truly. One of the fellows told me that I would be putting my life on hold but I don’t feel like I am. It’s just a continuation of what I want to do. After this year abroad I would like to go to school in the East Coast (Harvard!) and study Public Administration and International Relations. After getting my MPA, I would like to settle in DC or Austin. I really truly miss home and though I am not ready to go back to Texas….I do want to be close to my family which is why Austin is on the radar for me. DC has a lot of more opportunities career wise but we’ll see what happens then. Austin is just an hour flight away from my family and DC is 7 hours. I think I would love DC so much more if I could afford to go home more often.
Be healthy - eat right, feel happy, work out, develop and maintain healthy relationships with my friends and family.
Be there for my family that I absolutely love, adore and appreciate. I want to help them in any way that I can.
So now I feel so much better to have written all this out because I can go back and be like “oh yea” gotta work on that.
Oh I also want to read a bunch of good books and I will read right about now.
Also need to write back to Mine, Lau and Eury. :)
04 8 / 2012